The Thin Line of Approval
by Blonde Pickle Mule
Summary: It's Regulus' Black's eleventh birthday, and Sirius watches his family from the doorway, wishing he had something like that without the slightly psychotic, definitely pureblood-favouring views that have dominated his life since before he can remember.


**Here is my little drabble for the Hogwarts Online prompt of the day- "Happy Birthday Son." While this was an opportunity to write something non-depressing, I yet again managed to make it sad. **

**Disclaimer: I shall never own Harry Potter or anything to do with it, no matter how much I resent this fact.**

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It was Regulus' birthday, his eleventh. He was the family pride and joy and Sirius could already see it in the little brat's eyes- here was a Slytherin, sure as hell.

"Happy Birthday, son." His father's deep voice rumbled from inside the dining room where Regulus was no doubt being presented with the largest mound of presents money could buy. There was the high pitched voice of his mother, gushing over him, Kreacher's adoring squeaks and Sirius stood in the doors making sure he wasn't seen. It wasn't as if he _wanted _to be part of their family- he just wanted _a_ family; like Regulus so obviously had with their parents. He didn't understand.

Why couldn't he have nice, normal parents? Why was it him that got landed with the pure-blood fanatic, judgemental and just slightly psychotic mother plus a father that didn't care whether he lived or died? Why was it him that lived in a dingy old house with a mental house-elf and plaques of its ancestor's heads glued to the wall?

It didn't matter what bothered Remus every month (he was determined to figure that mystery out), or that Peter had barely made it through to second year. It didn't matter that James' aunt had died; as soon as they stepped off the train they had a family waiting for them with smiles and hugs, no matter what had happened. They were so lucky and they didn't even know it.

With a bitter sigh the twelve year old prised himself off the wall and pulled himself up the stairs. The only reason he still had a better room than Regulus was because he'd plastered it with Gryffindor hangings that couldn't be removed before his parents could drag him out. They'd still tried to compensate for his stuffy little brother as well, expanding it magically and giving him everything he wanted.

What hurt so much more was the fact it could have been _him. _If he'd only been different Sirius would have all that, he'd be loved and looked after. Some days he even wished he had been put in Slytherin, if only to fit in with everything he'd been brought up to. It was all very well and good having Hogwarts to go back to in a few days, but Sirius was missing something fundamental.

As a child everything had been fine, and though he'd been puzzled by some of his parents actions, he'd never had to question them, just keep quiet and everything was alright. He was happy living like that for a while, though by the time he'd stepped on the Hogwarts Express at the beginning of last year he was beginning to tire of it. Sirius had had no idea that his favour with his own parents was such a thin line.

The day he got a Howler for being placed in Gryffindor was both the best and the worst of his life. The best because looking back on it, it had shown him what he truly valued in life, but the worst because it was the day he'd first understood that in essence he had no family.

There was only one thing Sirius Black had to hold onto now, and that was his friends. They meant the world to him, seeing as there was nobody else competing for his affections. James was like the twin he'd never had, the ideal brother he'd always wanted. Remus was a sarcastic git that made him smile and was great for the mushy talk. Then there was Peter who was just so unbelievably stupid in lessons but incredibly clever with pranks it never ceased to be amusing.

If there was one thing Walburga and Orion had taught their young son it was to hold onto what he had with both hands, and Sirius was holding onto his friends with everything he had left.

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**Well then, I hope you enjoyed that and you leave me some feedback. I personally thought the style was a bit choppy, but what the heck. It's not terrible.**


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